Hiei's Torturific Fun Land
by Darck Moon
Summary: While everyone else is out, Hiei takes over the Ningenkai and turns it into an amusement park! Yusuke, Kurama, Kuwabara and a few others are now the guinea pigs for his rides, no matter how chaotic they are!
1. Ningenkai

Summary: While the Spirit gang are out doing a mission they return to the Ningenkai (human world) only to find out that Hiei has taken over and turned it into Hiei's Torturific Fun Land! And that's not the only thing, for the fire demon plans to turn everyone into guinea pigs for his rides. And to top it off, me, CD, LC and PG are working for Hiei!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or anything related to it. I just love humor and if that includes YYH, I'm there! Plus I like to write and have an evil imagination and that's never a good combo.  
  
Chapter One – Ningenkai  
  
Sigh, sneeze, scratch, sigh, fidget, randomly punches nearby orange head in boredom.  
  
Yup, Yusuke Urameshi was bored senseless.  
  
He had just returned from another mission with Kurama and Kuwabara. Hiei would of come but no one could find him. And in his opinion, it was easy enough to make the fire demon bored.  
  
"So where did the shrimp run off to?" Kuwabara asked rubbing the spot where he had just gotten socked.  
  
"Good question. Hiei has been gone for a while hasn't he?" Yusuke said, wishing that the idiot would just shut up.  
  
"I believe he's a bit busy nowadays. Last I heard he was doing something important." Kurama said who was walking alongside Urameshi.  
  
"Who cares? At least its good to be...what the hell!" Kuwabara shouted.  
  
They hadn't walked far before coming to a large gate, a sign hanging over the fence read...  
  
HIEI'S TORTURIFIC FUN LAND  
  
Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid  
  
"Hiei's Torture what?!" Yusuke yelled at the top of his lungs.  
  
"Nani!" Kuwabara shouted.  
  
"I hope the sign is to your liking, the writing would have been made from your own pathetic blood if you had been standing in front of me at the time instead of a lesser demon equal to your strength." The fire demon said and jumped from a tree to stand in front of them.  
  
"Where have you been Hiei? And what's with this fun land stuff?" Kuwabara shouted.  
  
"I took over the Ningenkai!" Hiei said in a happy voice, which was scary.  
  
"What!" All three of them shouted.  
  
"And turned it into an Amusement Park!" Hiei said in that still chipper voice, Yusuke sweat dropped and backed away slightly.  
  
"Excuse me?" Yusuke said hoarsely. Hiei's happy moon left suddenly and it was replaced with his serious expression.  
  
"Cool! Let us in!" Kuwabara said and started walking towards the gate but a quick movement from Hiei and the idiot tripped right over the outstretched leg and fell flat on his face with a sickening SPLAT.  
  
"He really is a hollow minded fool." Hiei muttered. Kuwabara jumped to his feet and started to shout at Hiei but as the fire demon reached for his sword in warning, the shouting stopped. "Fool, you need seven members in order to enter."  
  
"What!" Kuwabara yelled. "But we already have seven!"  
  
Everyone sweatdropped.  
  
Kurama sighed before saying, "Count Kuwabara."  
  
Kuwabara huffed saying, "Fine..." Using his fingers he muttered to himself, "One...Two...ah man we only have two!  
  
A very loud crash came from the others as they did an anime fall.  
  
Kurama recovered first. "Kuwabara, count yourself."  
  
"Oh ya, wait! Wouldn't the shrimp count?"  
  
"No you fool, I run this place and if you call me shorty, shrimp, or porcupine head I'll rip out your jaw, put it back in any way I like and send you one fire over a cliff." Hiei threatened.  
  
"At least he's getting creative..." Yusuke muttered to himself.  
  
"I know! Let's invite Botan and Koenma!" Kuwabara exclaimed as he clapped his hands together.  
  
Hiei's eyes shone with wicked mischief. "Oh yes, please do."  
  
"That would make..." (Kuwabara counts his fingers again...) "Five people!"  
  
"I could invite Keiko along but there is no way I'll be able to find her." Yusuke said scratching his head.  
  
"And I'll invite my beloved Yukina!" Kuwabara said and jumped with excitement. Hiei's eye twitched several times before he grinned, showing his large canines.  
  
"They'll be here soon."  
  
"How?" Kurama asked.  
  
Suddenly, all the members that were mentions suddenly appeared in the sky and landed with a loud crash onto the concrete. Of course, Yukina appeared standing already on the ground.  
  
"I was just doing paperwork you idiots!' Koenma shouted.  
  
"But you never do paperwork..." Botan started.  
  
"Shut up!" The toddler hollered.  
  
"If you have anything to do with this Yusuke, I swear I'm going to kill you." Keiko said with a clenched fist. Yusuke gulped.  
  
"Yukina! My love, are you alright?" Kuwabara said holding her hand.  
  
"Um, yes." Yukina said.  
  
And a very bit twitch came from Hiei.  
  
"How did you do that?" Kurama whispered over to the fire demon.  
  
"Jagan."  
  
"Oh..." The fox replied.  
  
Meanwhile, Yukina, Botan, Keiko and Koenma were reading the large sign above the gate.  
  
"Oh dear..." Keiko muttered.  
  
"Hiei!" Botan said surprised.  
  
"You can't just take over the Ningenkai!!" Koenma said, turning on Hiei.  
  
"You want it back?" He growled, a purple light coming from beneath his bandana.  
  
"No, not really." Koenma said and stepped back.  
  
"Enough with the pep talk! I wanna see what rides Hiei has come up with." Yusuke said and made his way towards the gate.  
  
"Won't you be surprised..." Hiei grinned and followed after him, the rest bringing up the rear of the line. The gate creaked open to reveal a path and they all followed it. After roughly 2 hours of walking they came to a flight of stone steps that never seemed to end.  
  
"Look's like grandma's boot camp..." Yusuke grumbled to himself and everyone went up the steps. Well, almost. Botan got on her oar (that suddenly appeared) and Koenma grabbed onto the end. Hiei zipped up the steps 10 at a time. The only reason why he was going slowly was because he didn't want to leave Yukina alone with the fool.  
  
Four hours later...  
  
Yusuke heaved himself up the last step and lay sprawled at the top. Kuwabara and Keiko weren't much better. Kurama was tired but because he was used to traveling as the Youko, he wasn't to exhausted. Hiei was leaning against a large wooden door glaring at a sleeping Koenma and Botan.  
  
"If those two don't stop snoring right now...I'll kill them." He growled.  
  
Yusuke looked at the big wooden door and sweatdropped. "Don't tell me, more stairs?"  
  
Keiko glared at Yusuke. "Better not be."  
  
Hiei grinned, "Behind this door is the amusement park. Ready detective, fox boy, Yukina and fools?"  
  
"Hey!" Everyone shouted, waking up Koenma and Botan.  
  
The door swung open and everyone went inside. There jaws dropped when they saw what lay within. Roller coasters covered most of the park, snack bars were scattered here and there while more rides lay between them.  
  
"To cool." Yusuke said, looking around.  
  
"I have to admit, you surprise me Hiei." Kurama acknowledged.  
  
"Hn."  
  
"I'm coming here more often!" Koenma shouted, looking at the food bars.  
  
"Great..." Botan said.  
  
"Look at that roller coaster Urameshi! Lets go!" Kuwabara said and ran over, followed by everyone else except for Hiei who lingered behind.  
  
"And the fun begins..." He said evilly.  
  
===  
  
I hope you like! I have more chapters to type up, there on paper but I have a lot to add on to them because there written like this:  
  
Hiei: Hn  
  
Yusuke: Whats your problem?  
  
And I don't like it that way anymore. I used to write like that but not anymore. The upcoming for counts 3 chapters focus around a ride. I only have 3 rides written down but one of those 3 chapters isn't about a ride. Anyways, review please! 


	2. The SHC

Summary: While the Spirit gang are out doing a mission they return to the Ningenkai (human world) only to find out that Hiei has taken over and turned it into Hiei's Torturific Fun Land! And that's not the only thing, for the fire demon plans to turn everyone into guinea pigs for his rides. And to top it off, me, CD, LC and PG are working for Hiei!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or anything related to it. I just love humor and if that includes YYH, I'm there! Plus I like to write and have an evil imagination and that's never a good combo.  
  
Keep those reviews coming!  
  
Chapter Two: "The SHC"  
  
"Dang it Hiei how big is this thing?!" Kuwabara said as the group gazed at the towering rollercoaster before them. Just looking at it made some of them sick, it started out with a steep rise; clouds covered the top of it. But when it came back down it was met by many, many loops, sharp turns and it was just plain sickening to look at.  
  
"Hiei?" Botan asked.  
  
"Hn."  
  
"Why is the ride called The SHC?" She asked, poking him in the shoulder. Hiei suddenly consumed himself in flames, catching Botan's Kimono sleeve on fire. So while the 'Grim Reaper' was running around in the background trying to make the fire go away Yusuke made his way towards the ride.  
  
"Who cares? Lets go!" He said. The rest of them nodded in agreement and started for the ride.  
  
"I think you should stay here Yukina, me and Urameshi will test this thing out first." Kuwabara said. Yusuke looked at him like he was mad "He can think?" he muttered.  
  
"Ok." Yukina said politely.  
  
Yusuke sat in the front row with Kuwabara, followed by Botan and Koenma behind them and finally Kurama and Keiko in the last row.  
  
"Won't you join us Hiei?" Kurama asked.  
  
"I have to run the ride." The fire demon responded.  
  
"I don't think I have a seatbelt..." Koenma said, looking around.  
  
"No one does." Hiei replied flatly.  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
"And as for the name SHC..." He said, cranking the lever next to the ride. The cart with the others started moving forward and up the incline. 'It means, spontaneously human combustion."  
  
The lever was cranked to full speed and the cart shot up the tracks.  
  
"Spontinus Human what?" Kuwabara said, gripping the front of the cart.  
  
"Spontaneously human combustion." Kurama repeated, gripping his seat in an iron grip. "It means that a human explodes for no apparent reason."  
  
The cart stopped at the very top of the hill and everyone grabbed the nearest steady object they could.  
  
"Is that a plane below us?" Botan said, pointing at it as it flew below them.  
  
"Oh reiki and back." Koenma muttered.  
  
"It's a great view!" Keiko said, forgetting about the danger.  
  
"Its nice and all, but I think we should hang on tightly." Kurama said, white in the face.  
  
"Why's that?" Botan replied.  
  
Hiei grabbed the microphone sitting next to him and spoke to the awaiting cart. "Please hang on tightly or you will fall out and into oblivion." Short pause..."Actually Kuwabara, don't hang on."  
  
"HIEI!" The idiot said loudly.  
  
"Sayonara." Hiei said and hung up the microphone.  
  
"I am going to hurt you Hieiiiiiiiii!!!!" Yusuke shouted as the cart plummeted down the tracks.  
  
The cart shot down, easily breaking 100 mph. And as soon as they reached the bottom the cart was sent through ten loops, each higher then the last.  
  
"I'm gonna hurl!" Kuwabara said, turning green in the face.  
  
"Not on me your not!" Yusuke shouted at him and tried pushing him away. The cart twisted and turned viciously on the tight corners. The cart going completely sideways at a few points. They shot up a ramp, getting closer and closer to what appeared to be a gap in the tracks.  
  
"AAAAH!!" Botan screamed at the top of her lungs and clenched Koenma tightly.  
  
"Can't...breathe!" The toddler cried.  
  
"What the...!" Kuwabara shouted.  
  
"There's a gap!" Keiko shrieked.  
  
"What!" Kurama shouted looking around the two rows in front of him.  
  
"HIEI!" Yusuke hollered as loud as he could.  
  
The cart sailed over the gap, crashed onto the other side and screeched to a halt in front of Hiei & Yukina. Everyone was wide-eyed.  
  
"Hiei...." Yusuke panted.  
  
"Hn."  
  
"AGAIN!" The spirit detective shouted.  
  
"NO!!!"  
  
Hiei cranked the lever and the cart shot off once more. 


End file.
